Thursday, July 29, 2010

Matthew 19:6 - (My husband who wrote me a love note this morning.).

I read this today and it brought me to tears. - Robin

by Anonymous

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!

That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. This was agreeable to me.

But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her. On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this.

It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.

On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore. She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce.

My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy.

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up. A CHRIST-CENTERED MARRIAGE IS A MARRIAGE THAT IS SURE TO LAST A LIFETIME.

"So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." Matthew 19:6

Wednesday, July 28, 2010


by Robin

You know those little 2-door windows at the doctor's office that go between the bathroom (think urine sample) and the lab counters, I was thinking how handy they would be in a home. I wish I could count the number of times somebody needed a roll of toilet paper or a new pair of underpants. Wouldn't that be great to call out a need and somebody place it in the little metal window and a few seconds later, you could grab it with still keeping your dignity intact?

Ahh, it's the simple things in life that make you laugh and yet, make sense.

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Beautiful One

by Robin

This is what we'll be opening up service with tomorrow. Not only are the words beautiful, but I love it when the lady in the back of church signs it. The hand motions are just as beautiful.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

GARDEN REPORT - July heat!!!

by Robin

I was hoping to do something like a Wordless Wednesday but it's not going to happen this Wednesday.

We're in that phase where we're having unbearable heat yet very little rain the past couple weeks. That last time it rained heavy was 4th of July. I try not to water much, but I have seedlings in the garden, so I do hit those almost daily.

Pictured below is mostly my herb & pepper portion of the garden. Oregano and tarragon are growing like weeds. I had 3 of each of them started from small pots this spring. So, I transferred a couple of them into pots and lined my pool steps with them. Love that!! The little pots are chocolate-peppermint starters that I plan to give away for the holidays. I also cleaned up this entire area and planted cilantry, flat-leaf parsley, basil, dill and bunching onion seeds.


Below is the right side of the garden. All the spring stuff was pulled and some of it is still empty dirt waiting for fall/winter plants. I did put in some canteloupe seeds from some fruit I bought at the store. They just began blooming. I'm hoping that by the time the hurricane rains hit, they'll be filling baby canteloupes with plenty of water. The bush beans are stressed from the heat. My old variety of cherry toms are doing their normal heat stress, dead by August. But the new variety in the back, bred for heat, seems to be green & healthy but producing very little tomatoes. Hmmm... I'll probably pull some of the worse ones as I put in the new plants.

Here are my new potted herbs. They're so healthy!! My other purpose in doing this is that if we have hard freezes, I can pull the pots in and save some stuff.

Have a blessed day!

Friday, July 16, 2010


by Robin

Sometimes life brings your little surprises that turn into wonderful memories & moments. A few weeks ago, I got an email from a college friend who said she was in my area the next few days, and was I available. Sure. A couple, then few days went by and I figured I had missed my chance.

I got home one morning from getting our testing results and there was a message on my voice mail. It was her! I called them back and they were practially around the corner from my area. I was never so thankful to have a partially cleaned house, well-stocked pantry and a bra on. LOL. (C'mon..... you've been there too ladies.) I invited them to the house for lunch and it was non-stop talking the moment they arrived. The kids were fast friends as well.

Cathy and I met the first day of college in the lunch line. We were roomates twice in our college careers. We stood next to each other in our graduation ceremony. She attended my wedding and I was in her wedding a few months later. I passed down lots of nursery items to her. We visited each other as much as possible through the past 20+ years. An hour or so was not enough time to catch up even though we're FB friends and email buddies. I wish I could have spent days with them instead of head off to VBS and them to Kennedy Space Center. But, we make the most of life and cherish these sweet moments.

And I always make sure I get a picture of our visitors......


We love you guys!! Come again anytime!

Wednesday, July 7, 2010


by Robin

Oops, forgot a couple pics from yesterday......




Tuesday, July 6, 2010

4th of July

by Robin

I wish I had time to sit & compose something more thoughtful but you'll have to settle for pictures. Gee, I thought I'd have more time when summer came, but the truth is, I never had lots of free time. I love finding projects for myself. This morning, it was tearing apart the dying garden matter & tilling up ground. I'm prepping for a fall garden.

Here are the 3rd & 4th of July photos:

My sister & her hubby

My older sister, her hubby & 2 daughters came to visit us for the weekend. Most of these pictures are of us from the beach and then dinner & the fireworks show. I'm glad we did all that stuff on Saturday because we were rained out on Sunday for most the day.


My niece who was born 60 hrs after my eldest, Simon Peter.


Simon Peter below.


Rock Shrimp about to be broiled.

Guys in the kitchen.

My niece (younger sister).

The 2 of the left celebrated their 1st, 2nd, 3rd & maybe 4th birthdays together. Now, they're doing it again for their 14th. Wow how time flies. (Btw, that's fudge brownies, not cake)

Happy Birthday you two!!! Quit growing up!!!


I actually got inspired to blog our last 2 trips out fishing. (If you're a friend and want to be added to my private fishing blog, please send a request in the comments area.)

Surf Fishing last week.

Offshore, last month.